The Flâneur File

Ahmed Chalabi - Man for All Seasons

2006-01-02T14:47:00.000-05:00

The Flaneur File has kept its ever-vigilant eye on Ahmed Chalabi since early 2002, when it became known that Chalabi's Iraqi National Congress, an umbrella group of Iraqi exiles working for the overthrow of Saddam Hussein, was the principal provider of "intelligence" to the United States in all matters Iraqi. Chalabi is the man who gave us the informant code-named "curve-ball" (we should have

Dr. Zhivago in Greasepaint

2005-12-29T15:53:00.000-05:00

Clowns - amusing, tragic, annoying, frightening, insipid, talented and inane. Frequently exhibiting all these qualities at once. No better example can be provided than "Slava's Snowshow", now appearing at the Union Square Theatre (once a stronghold of NYC's own Tammany Tigers).Spoiler Alert: I will be revealing a bit of storyline here (or what could loosely refered to as such), so if you intend

A departure of sorts...

2005-12-29T01:01:00.000-05:00

It is not the custom of this space to propagate cliched stereotypes for the sake of a few yucks, but this blonde joke takes funny to a whole new level.

Flaneur Finds, Facts, and Follies - Anniversary Edition

2005-12-28T13:19:00.000-05:00

"Another year...still standing..."28th December, 2005 marks the first anniversary of the Flaneur File. In review of the past year, The File could be called a halting, if mildly promising, effort at best. The File endeavors to improve both upon the frequency and quality of its offerings, and welcomes both the criticism and accolades of you, the reader.As such, The File will be making a few

Alistair Cooke meets the Ghouls of New York

2005-12-22T10:15:00.000-05:00

Recall the story from October 2005 concerning a criminal ring whose primary function was the procural, trade and traffic of human body parts. Said body parts having been illegally harvested from several NYC area funeral homes. The Brooklyn D.A's office centered their investigation around one Michael Mastromarino - cocaine enthusiast, defrocked (or is it desmocked) dentist, co-author of "Smile:

Lost in Transit / The Flaneur File Finds

2005-12-22T06:21:00.000-05:00

As of 5:30 this morning, Roger "I'm no Joe Hill" Toussaint and Peter "There is No More" Kalikow have again got themselves a room at the Hyatt and are therein cloistered. While details on the current state of negotiations are scant, the Flaneur has been reliably informed that a lively and heated discussion regarding the complimentary mint on the pillow could be heard through their room

Whither goest thou, Flaneur?

2005-11-08T09:06:00.000-05:00

The Flaneur fell to a state he never thought he would find himself in. Lost. He, of all, who knew twisting alleys and broad boulevards, dark slums and glittering towers. Lost. Lost in his own City, a stranger to himself, let alone the throngs he loved so well.As well he knows, it takes more than one wrong turn to lose ones bearings. Usually it is a series of unconscious decisions that combine to

diner to go, regular.

2005-02-15T12:53:00.000-05:00

Thirty-odd years later I again leave all these things behind me as I slide into the booth at the corner diner. The bustling white-shirted waiter approaches, carrying a menu beneath his arm. “Y’wunna see manu?” “Yeah, and gimme some coffee too, willya?” “One coffee, righ’ back sir” Busboy runs dampened rag across the table, sets out precisely one napkin, one fork, one knife.

The Amsterdam House

2005-02-13T01:11:00.000-05:00

Across the breadth of Amsterdam Avenue, facing the Cathedral of St. John the Divine, sits a curious hybrid of a building. The façade on the Amsterdam side is a rough representation of the pre-war apartment buildings typical of the neighborhood. All best intentions aside, it cannot help but look like new construction. Even the latest of technologies cannot falsify the age of a building. The

Bedrock

2005-02-12T09:55:00.000-05:00

Not far from where I stand there used to be a pub owned and run by a Scotswoman named Catherine McGown, and later her descendants. Unsurprisingly, it was popularly known as McGown’s Pub. The establishment, which was situated on an aboriginal trail called Old Harlem Road, opened in 1759 and remained in business until the 1840’s; proof that the City’s Bar and Restaurant trade was not always so

Gates of the West

2005-02-10T15:03:00.000-05:00

photo: Wolfgang Volz ©2005 Christo Upon entering New York City's Central Park this week, one is bound to run into a most fascinating process. All over the park, groups of cheerful men and women are erecting large arches of international orange over almost every pedestrian path. On Saturday the 12th, swaths of saffron fabric will unfurl from the top of these arches all creating a massive...

14th Street Jump

2005-02-05T16:40:00.000-05:00

packed platform thick with bodies, sweat, too many breaths not enough air weaving and bobbing my way to the end of the platform knowing sensing something irregular in the heavy air annoucements over pa system, heads turning upward to look at the speakers like dogs responding to the voice of their master platform closed at 14th

storm

2005-01-25T01:27:00.000-05:00

The storm clouds close in around him quickly, and without warning. As the warm winds begin to howl around him and the driving rain pelts his face, he laughs at his own naiveté for not seeing it coming all along. After all this time, he says to himself, and you still can't see it coming...can't feel the change in the air pressure, can't hear the silence as the beasts of the sea, land, air, and

2005-01-24T00:23:00.000-05:00

The Blizzard of Aught-Five, Part II

2005-01-23T01:01:00.000-05:00

photo by Captain Clark (This is the second of a two-part series, the first part of which appears below. But you can read this one first if you're one of those radical convention-breaking types. I really don't care. Time is relative anyway, right?) I am returned. The expedition, if I may be so bold as to call it such, was successful. Rather than waiting to compile the findings in a

The Blizzard of Aught-Five, Part I

2005-01-22T18:19:00.000-05:00

Union Square during the Blizzard of 1888 - Harper's Weekly, March 24, 1888. Severe Weather Alert from the National Weather Service ...BRONX NY-HUDSON NJ-KINGS (BROOKLYN) NY-NASSAU NY- NEW YORK (MANHATTAN) NY-NORTHEAST SUFFOLK NY-NORTHWEST SUFFOLK NY- QUEENS NY-RICHMOND (STATEN IS.) NY-SOUTHEAST SUFFOLK NY- SOUTHWEST SUFFOLK NY- 516 PM EST SAT JAN 22 2005 ... A BLIZZARD WARNING CONTINUES IN

Liberty Street (or, How does a Jay walk?)

2005-01-22T14:03:00.000-05:00

image courtesy of The City of New York/NYPD We are constantly exhorted to be ever obedient and mindful of traffic regulations. Be you a pedestrian, driver, bicycler, skateboarder or hot dog vendor you are subject to costly fines or even imprisonment for disobedience of the traffic laws so carefully designed to keep us safe from each other. But what if there were no traffic laws? No lanes,

Coronation Day

2005-01-20T13:13:00.000-05:00

image courtesy of The Temple of GWBUSH In celebration of the Coronation of King Dubya, I would like to present to you some budget comparisons relevant to the celebrations in the District of Columbia this week. These figures are courtesy of The American Progress Action Fund. $40 million: Cost of Bush inaugural ball festivities, not counting security costs. $2,000: Amount FDR spent on the

Coney Island Winter

2005-01-19T06:29:00.000-05:00

photo © Urban75 Only residency or lunacy would bring one to the very ends of Brighton Beach in January. On Brighton Avenue the wind through the el howls and bites, gusting with the bravado of a typically cruel servant of this New York City winter. But a mere block away, the air turns genuinely sinister, as though willfully trying to suck the air from your body and replace it with its own

And lest we forget....

2005-01-18T10:38:00.000-05:00

We should all be this amused

Table for Two

2005-01-18T01:34:00.000-05:00

Dusky bottle nigh empty save the dregs sits between us on a table lightly sprinkled with the leavings of a meal neither of us much wanted to eat. I confess to you my sins, my culpability, my responsibility. You laugh, not unkindly, in that way that always made me think of June. You too in turn admit your faults and that you thought the reason for our drifting apart all those years ago was you.

The Green Lake

2005-01-18T01:30:00.000-05:00

Prospect Park Boat ramp on the lake beneath Bidden Falls. Beautiful beautification renovation restoration. Tucked in between two landscaped rocks lies a discarded aluminum can. It is akin to the too-loud whisper of a guest of a disastrous party - which whisper, coincidentally or not, occurs at the precise moment of an absense of ambient party noise. It should be noted that this moment of

Opera in the Park

2005-01-17T23:56:00.000-05:00

Porcelaine vanilla white brushed steel mottled black canned pear shaped tones Do the wrong thing right Mary's dress waves Mary stress waves Opera in Great Meadow Blankets, candles, wine, cheese, fruit, friends and thou and thou, and thou and thou over there too. Westward Ho Newly landscaped terrace atop hill Stepping stone trails and utter solitude Soparano aria reverberates off buildings on

Downtown B Train

2005-01-17T22:16:00.000-05:00

"she don't care no more, she gets paid on Friday" -J. Jackson Indefinable Qualities("I.Q.") Can you define her in thine eyes? Albemarle Finch was a perfidious gent, but thats